E-Books


Want to be environmentally friendly? Don’t wear fur, because did you know it takes 14 trees just for the protest signs alone? Well, that’s according to Emo Phillips anyway. That crazy guy.

An even better way to save trees is to stop picking up those free copies of the Toronto Star and get yourself an environmentally friendly e-book reader. Aside from saving the planet, you’ll find that your fingers will not turn black and need washing just to find out what movies are playing tonight.

You’ll notice that your IQ will increase by having free access to the world class journalism of the Guardian and the New York Times. You’ll be able to turn pages on the Downsview 196 without bonking someone on the head; you won’t need to be skilled in the art of origami to fold the pages; and you’ll be able to carry the newspaper in your pocket.

While waiting in line at Tim Horton’s, would you rather stare blankly at the floor while enjoying the fascinating conversation ahead of you about how unfair that psych TA is, and don't you think I should get auburn highlights. Or would you rather check the weather forecast and find out what country George is invading today - the choice is yours.

“Ok,” I hear you say. “That’s all good – and I like having rainforests and stuff – but I’ll go blind reading that itty-bitty screen, and doesn’t all this gadgetry cost a bundle?”

Well, let me start by revealing that along with the newspapers, I’ve read all five Harry Potters on my Palm Vx without any change in my glasses prescription.

Alright, I’ll wait until you’re done laughing. Yes, yes, go on and tell the person beside you what a mega geek this Excalibur guy is.
You’re back? Ok, there’s more – I wrote this article on my palmtop too. Go on, finish telling your new buddy about this dork you’re reading about, I’ll wait. Ah yes, we all enjoy a good laugh, don’t we.

But let me tell you this: I never have to look for an electrical outlet when typing papers or articles because my palmtop’s battery life is measured in MONTHS, not hours. Which brings me to my next point. An e-book reader doesn’t cost a lot of money because you should only buy a cheap used one. It turns out that all the current models cause major eyestrain and suck power like a Vanier frosh drinking beer at the Open End. Not a pretty sight for sore eyes, to mix a metaphor.
You see, it’s like this. You need to buy a book reader that has a black and white screen. Why? Because it’s like a calculator or digital watch. You can read it in the bright sunlight and you don’t have to have a constant backlight that uses up the vast majority of your battery life. And if it’s dark? Well, didn’t your mother tell you that you shouldn’t read in the dark? But if you must, you can, since most of these devices have a backlight option when you need it.

So what should you look for on ebay or the used computer store? You need a Palm Vx, Palm IIIx, Palm 500, HP200LX or any RCA e-book reader.

Anything else either has poor battery life (e.g. anything with the word “Windows” in it) or is too small/dim a screen (older PalmPilots). You can generally find them for less than $100. There is hope for new devices on the horizon though. Check out the photo of the new electronic paper!
Excalibur Naked Tech